Revised #2

17. My perfect day

My perfect day would involve me waking up really early. One of my favorite times of the day is when it seems like you’re the only person in the world that is awake. I’d go get an Einstein’s bagel and then read some. When everyone else wakes up id want to hang out with my friends all day. Then go home at night and watch a great movie.

26. Marty says, “Love isn’t a feeling. It’s an ability.” Is that true

I think love is a feeling. Everyone is always expressing love to something whether it’s a person or object everyone has a great pull towards something. The reason it can be seen as an ability is that when you feel love for something we like to express it through actions.

30. Are you a good bowler? I am an awful bowler. Always have been and always will be.

22.  Dan tells the kids at the abandoned Shack O’ Shells that “life is full of disappointment.”  Do you think that’s true?  How do you deal with disappointment? I think it is true that life is full of disappointments. It sucks but it is. The reason we are always disappointed is that we are hoping in the wrong things.

11.  Where was your best hiding spot as kid playing Hide and Seek? My best hiding spots as a kid were in really small spaces like cabinets under the sink because I was really small. I also remember playing cops and robbers really late at night and hiding in shadows.

Millennial Photo

I picked the photo of the space shuttle falling apart in the atmosphere because space travel amazes me. Its crazy to think that people have been on the moon we look up at in the night sky! I can't comprehend all the calculations those scientist have to make to send those rockets up in the air. When I was little I got to see the last space shuttle launch. The last one. Thats pretty cool to me. I think it would be awesome to experience zero gravity.

Flea Market Pictures

All young spicoli needed was a soda pop and some taste waves. This was the simple life of youth. Before responsibility and worries. When every night was a free night. Before the crippling fear of death haunted him every night. Before the war and before the death of a friend. These are the last of his golden years. Spicoli died in the war from a gunshot.

Kermit the Pizza King Revised

Pizza Pie. Oh my. Why oh why my pizza pie. Why do I cry, pizza pie. Oh my. These are the thoughts that rattle my mind. As I eat a pizza pie so good. I want to die. When I finish, a heavy sigh. The year was 1979. The place was Papa Jays.  It wasn't the restaurant though. We were college roommates, and he was experimenting with different pizza recipes to find the perfect one.  He was determined to find better ingredients, and therefore better pizza.  That was papa's philosophy.  Eventually he did find the perfect recipe with my help, and he became one of the most popular chefs of all time.  The secret ingredient was a little more salt. THis recipe took papa to new heights he never imagined himself at. He soared abouve all pizza both past present and future. Your good old pal Kermit tried to sue him. It went all the way to the supreme court. Its the famous Kermit Papa case. From this case came the 78th amendment. This ammendment illigalized any use of LSD, cocain, and or, tobacci in pizza product. Papa had hooked the country on drugs. He was put to death immediatly. And the prezeydent awarded me Kermit. With Free pizza for life. Your welcome world. Your Welcome all. Your friend Kermit saved the pizza pie. After this day Kermit was recognized nationally as the King of Pizza. At first this was a gleeful time for the world. Pizza peace was established across the world and foreign pizza relations with the Italians were top notch. Oh how I miss those times. Fore they did not last long. Soon the pizza power was too much for Kermit. Like Lucifer after the fall. A once magnificent beast plagued to haunt the world of its folly.

Pizza Pie

Pizza Pie. Oh my. Why oh why my pizza pie. Why do I cry, pizza pie. Oh my. These are the thoughts that rattle my mind. As I eat a pizza pie so good. I want to die. When I finish, a heavy sigh. The year was 1979. The place was Papa Jays.  It wasn't the restaurant though. We were college roommates, and he was experimenting with different pizza recipes to find the perfect one.  He was determined to find better ingredients, and therefore better pizza.  That was papa's philosophy.  Eventually he did find the perfect recipe with my help, and he became one of the most popular chefs of all time.  The secret ingredient was a little more salt. THis recipe took papa to new heights he never imagined himself at. He soared abouve all pizza both past present and future. Your good old pal Kermit tried to sue him. It went all the way to the supreme court. Its the famous Kermit Papa case. From this case came the 78th amendment. This ammendment illigalized any use of LSD, cocain, and or, tobacci in pizza product. Papa had hooked the country on drugs. He was put to death immediatly. And the prezeydent awarded me Kermit. With Free pizza for life. Your welcome world. Your Welcome alll. Your friend Kermit saved the pizza pie.

This is where

This is me yelling

This is me being the boss of my destiny

This is twenty years of anger management going down the drain

This is my life

This is a child at heart learning the lessons of life

This is the rejection of a father being taken out on his employees.

This is never giving up

This is the symphony of life

Scare Tactics

Kermit’s Spooky Halloween: In The Style Of Scare Tactics

WOOOOOOOoooooooh. Happy Halloween Everybody! Hope your getting in the spooky spirit as the trick or treating season is approaching. But first let me tell you a story of old. So old you probably wont believe me. But that’s ok cause I actually make up most of my stories anyway. About two years ago your papi Kermit here decided to go on a huge pranking streak after getting laid off from his night shift at Best Buy. So I called up my good ol buddy big bird. He loves pranking. Jason Seagull tagged along as well. He’s always there for me. Oh what a guy. We three kings set out to set the record for most tricks pulled in one trick or treat run. Bird man insisted that we start at this guy named James house. So we hauled over there. I being the frog of the group ribbeted the door bell. Rib bit. No one came. I hopped on around back rabbit rabbet. Hamm. Something mischievous was going on in there. I called the Seaman around back to see if he could get a better look. Oh my lanta Was all he said. 

He gave me a quick look of disbelief and then turned into a seagull and flapped his way into all our hearts as Marshall Ericksen in the hit TV series. How I Met Your Mother. But he actually did leave. So it was just the bird and I. I started getting freaked out about how yellow he was. We hopped into a yellow taxi. I saw a bird flying. Taxi bird, yes its all coming together. I just solved a case I got about eight years ago. Too late now though. That whole family died. Wait is big bird a murderer? This is getting real spooky man. How’d I get at this pond? Slowly a giant frog emerges from the water uttering nonsensical jibberish pish posh magosh about killing humans. Some people get too carried away with the holiday. Well I never ended up pranking anybody but I did get one thing. Come closer and I’ll show you. Boo!

Photo Hunt

Life is full of choices, choose wisely.

Make friends wherever you go.

Stay informed.

The circle of life.

Don't be a square.

Memories of shenanigans.

Handwritten is best written.

This kinda looks like a face.

Just hanging at the field.

Stop and smell the ferns.

Woah watch out.

Always have a good attitude.

Vending machines are a hotspot for chit chat

Thats an interesting angle.

It Was a Perfect Lift-off

 

It was a perfect lift off. Is what most people would have said if the rocket house didn't blow up when it hit the elevation on 10,000 ft. It was the classic UP plot. Old man has a happy life but when things start not going his way he decides to skip town. This guy tried to go all Bill Nye though by just dropping a ton (literally a ton) of baking soda into his bathtub full of vinegar. The technology just wasn't there. This travesty sparked a tradition in the community that has been carried out for many a generation. The Cincinnati Lift Off is what they called it. Why Cincinnati I don't know. Im pretty sure they lived in Cleveland but whatever bro. Whats that? Oh ok I'l tell them Eric. Eric just told me it was because the old mans name was Cincinnati. Thanks Eric! So this tradish has been going on for about 17 years by this point in the present as I am telling this story right now in the present not the past but right now. Now. YOLO.

 This was the year Tonto was going to make his first appearance in five years since Tony beat him. Boy did he beat hime. It was pretty bad guys. Yes there was blood and yes people did die, but the spirit of the game lived on. And that spirit strived in Tontos body. Like a nice tomato in a good marinara. Mmmmmmm I love marinara. Hey Eric could we get carry out from Zios tonight? No I want the Marinara. Eric are you listening? I always get the marinara why would I get the fetching? Oh I need a new attitude? Maybe I need a new assistant your fired! POW POW! Wait Eric Im sorry I didn't mean it. Oh God Why! It all happened so fast! Sniffle. He was the best assistant I ever had, but a better friend…

R.I.P. Eric

Movie quotes

Dumb and Dumber, Rushmore, THe Outlaw Josey Wales, Dazed and Confused.

Hey it’s Kermit again. Shoo shoo don’t cry boo. As I look into your eyes I realize two things. I hate you. I love you. I am you. This is a mirror. What’s a mirror you say. Humph I know right get outta here. They say to be green is to deal with the politics of the soul. If that’s true I’m the f@#*ing president. Jason Seagull enters. “Mr. President their waiting.” His voice lingers in my frog ears as I search my thinker for a solution.  “Sea Man what would you do?” “Spidey use your senses. You were always the best at these things.” God how did I get in this mess?  Flashback!

I find myself falling back in time, back in space, back in frog people time too, which according to the U.S frog census operates slightly different than cat and squirrel time. This always skrews me when I’m trying to flashback cause I have to wait like two hours in a waiting room with Leonardo DiCaprio till they can convert the different times. We chatted about his new films and what not. He is a pretty cool guy. Then the lady at the desk called me up and they had my time period ready. When I was back in 2010 I found myself behind that cherry counter that I spent so many nights working behind as a youth. I remember this night specifically though.

This was the night the Bert and Ernie really got into it. They came in around eight. Bert was crying and Ernie was trying to talk some since into him. I could tell they were trying to keep their dispute on the down low but everyone in the joint could tell something was up. I took their order for some milk shakes and tried to listen in to what they were whispering about. Something about a bank robbery and a giraffe with some deadly dance moves. NIGHTHAWK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!